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Pain in the Bum

Noel's picture

By Noel - Posted on 29 March 2010

So for the 1st 38 years of my life I never encountered chaffing. Now that I haven't smoked for 2.5 years I put on 5 kg and sometimes, maybe it's heat or diet or my underwear or I-don't-know, but sometimes (it sure seems to be heat related) I get a bit of what must be 'chaffing' on two very small bits of opposing bum cheek.

I've seen a disturbing photo of Gary applying something to his undercarriage prior to an event. Is that my future? Am I destined to becoming an axle greaser? I'm just under 70 kg. How can my buns-of-steel do this to me?

Any tips?

How do you post a really really big high res image again (j/k)?

[Mod. moved to general gear]

Brian's picture

I recently had this issue wearing lycra and scumming even though never had the issue before. It ended up being from the seam in my undies so I have stopped wearing them. I mean my undies, not lycra (not joking) Smiling

Slowpup's picture

Why anyone would drop good money on nicks, and then line them with a scrunchy piece of cotton is beyond me.

If you wear Lycra, get over your inhibitions... only your wife and kids will judge you for going commando under it all.

A message from the ministry of posterior protection.

Hans's picture


...welcome to the slippery side.

You need Udder Butter, or Udderly Smooth, or Assos Skin creme (check CRC)

before and after....

or maybe its your seat?

b there soon's picture

I have been using Friction Zone from and it is awesome. Much better than assos and the like, you apply it directly to yourself and a bonus its cheaper. I see they are sponsoring the singletrack mind series so you might be lucky enough and get some samples.

Scottboy's picture

your riding apparel ???? YYYY I ride 5km to work & I put up with that but any further I will go the sorbolene cream atm, till I buy something else

PIVOT MACH 5's picture

Its affordable and anti septic, apply directly to any potential chaffing points and DO NOT WEAR ANYTHING UNDER YOUR BIKE KNICKS.

Fatboy's picture

Ditch the underwear as they are a breeding ground for bacteria. Modern bike pants are made with anti fungal chamois.

Get a cheap tub of sorbolene cream from the supermarket and squish it between your cheeks before you ride - it feels like you've had the runs but once seated you won't notice it.

Afterwards if you have chaffing and/or saddle sores (blind pimples caused by bacteria) then apply a child nappy rash cream like Bepanthem.

It's very important to keep your bike pants free from bacteria so good practice is to place them straight in the laundry tub and soak them in water with a dash of Dettol and Napisan. Then wash them as per normal.

Noel's picture

Looks like I better start free-balling.

I bet the Dettol would help kill "glove stink" too.

We do have some nappy rash cream around here too if things get bad.

Thanks for the help!

Bartman's picture

Elite brand chamois cream is the go. Wash knicks after every ride. Hope this helps. Oh almost forgot, 333b cream from chemist reduces sweating if that is a problem.

Scottboy's picture

& used the Aussie butt cream I got for free from the Mont , even tho I did only 23kms on the hybrid there is no chaffing & I used to use Sorbolene.. GO THE AUSSIE BUTT CREAM LOL

Brian's picture

I used Aussie Butt Cream today for the first time today. Interesting feeling to start with but it seemed to work quite well.

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